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Loving An Addict To Death: How To Stop Enabling And Start Supporting


There can often come a point when families, friends, and loved ones of addicts and alcoholics find themselves wondering how to stop being codependent because they notice that their love for them has become more destructive than helpful. Noticing signs of codependency can be difficult because it is all too easy to confuse caring for your loved one with enabling your loved one and causing their recovery process to decline detrimentally.

How to Stop Being Codependent and Why It’s Important

Showing support of your loved one will play an important role during their recovery because they need to know that they can rely and depend on people in their life. However, it won’t benefit them if you consistently continue to live there life for them by taking care of all their necessities and matters. By continuing to enable them, you aren’t allowing them to function on their own or achieve their full potential by completing tasks for themselves. Your love for the addict is suffocating them and the codependency you have with them will ultimately only harm their well-being.


Seeing the signs of codependency is necessary in order to move forward with implementing changes to work on having healthier, more stable relationships. It is only when people can realize that there is truly an issue posing a problem that they can work to better correct the issue at hand.

Set Boundaries

Having a conversation with your loved one about the ways you are and aren’t willing to help will get the both of you on the same page. This not only brings healthy communication to your relationship, but it creates a better-rounded environment that sets you up for success. You will both be able to tell when you are taking advantage of one another if you clearly outline in the beginning what your wants and needs are.

Different Ways Loved Ones Stop Addicts from Getting Better

Enabling and loving your addict to death can look different than you may expect it. You genuinely may not even realize that you are doing it and that is why it is crucial to be vigilant about how you are acting towards your loved one who is suffering from addiction because you don’t want to put them or yourself at risk by dampening the relationship you have. If you think you are helping them by spending money on them time and time again, you may really just be providing that crutch that they need so that they can stock up on money for their own selfish needs. Sometimes money is a trigger, especially early in recovery for addicts and it can set them off to act impulsively by spending recklessly or even ultimately venturing off on a relapse just because they can. Other ways can include always listening to what your loved one says. Addicts need structure in recovery because for so long they have been running rampant going off their own rules and it hasn’t worked for them seeing as they got entangled in the disease that addiction brought into their life. They don’t need you giving into their every desire by cosigning their proclaimed prophecies. Learning to say no and standing up to your loved one in a courteous manner may prove to help your loved one more than enabling them ever could.

Is your loved one not yet in the process of recovery because they are still active in their addiction to drugs and/or alcohol? Contact The Watershed today because it is possible to recover and your loved one deserves the opportunity. The disease of addiction is serious and affects the mind and body, so call The Watershed today because their life shouldn’t have to be put on hold any longer.



Read 5160 times Last modified on Tuesday, 18 November 2014 21:30
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