By working a recovery program for an alcohol and/or drug addiction, you can develop meaningful and genuine friendships along the way. However, it’s unfortunately not unusual when friends made in recovery go separate ways with their program into unhealthy environments as time goes on. It may be a struggle for you as an alcoholic and/or addict as you wonder how to deal with this situation. Although the friendship may be important to you, protecting your own sobriety needs to be top priority.
Dealing with friends in recovery who go separate ways with their program can be hard for you as an alcoholic and/or addict. In the beginning, you may have been working a strong program and met friends in recovery through a 12-step fellowship, transitional living environment, or rehabilitation facility that you entered. These recovering individuals may have been ambitious about their sobriety with you at one point but now you may be finding they aren’t willing to put in the effort to do their step work, get to meetings, contact their sponsor or sober supports, share at meetings, or do their daily chores. When there isn’t willingness and character defects begin to come out, it can be an early warning sign for trouble. This can mean the individual doesn’t want to take a look at themselves and that they aren’t ready to commit to change. If they aren’t ready for change, then they aren’t going to grow. This makes it likely for them to revert back to former behaviors they should realize no longer suit them.
When your friends in recovery go separate ways with their program into an unhealthy mindset and you feel it may cloud your judgement, a good suggestion may be to set boundaries with your friend. Limit yourself to only being with your friends if it is going to be at a 12-step meeting or at a sober event. This can reassure you that the conversations you will be having with your friends will be guided to a solution of recovery while leaving you in a safe environment.
Understanding & Acceptance
A huge aspect to grasp about recovering from an addiction to alcohol and/or drugs is that individuals heal at their own pace. Recovery doesn’t happen instantaneously but rather occurs gradually as a process by alcoholics and addicts trudging through the work. As they begin to work on themselves, more information is exposed to them about themselves, other people, and the world. It’s important to realize each alcoholic and addict has their own walk in recovery. When friends in recovery go separate ways, it doesn’t mean one individual is greater than or less than the other but rather they are each on their own journey. It may take longer for others to grasp if they truly want to recover from their disease, then they simply cannot cling onto past ideas and negative behaviors any longer and must let go completely.